Last night was a night of many realizations. Having bad pronunciation was not one of them.
I finally discovered why my sketchbook felt so dead for the past few years. I had totally removed passion out of the equation from my sketches. They were dead boring passionless studies to make myself improve so that I sketch better, or so I can draw better anatomy or perspective.
Last night as I was hanging out with my friends they were all sketching in their sketchbook and I decided to join them, at the same time testing out my new brushpen. (I've never used one before then, and now I don't think I can ever sketch without one) Decided to draw a bunch of robots, and soon it evolved into a bursting forth of my inner voice that I've silenced for so long. I could hear it crying and I wondered to myself, what have I done? and I suddenly had that childlike curiosity to grab any medium I can find and put it down on paper. Markers, brush, highlighters and now I even feel like doing some collage.
Last night I've had more fun sketching than I've had in years. I realised I've just been striving to draw things that would make my portfolio look good, or things that would get me a job. I had not drawn for myself in a long long time.
In a way, this also answered my question as to how I'm going to separate my work from my passion, as there had never been a clear separation between the two.
A few years ago, a friend told me about this technique called "f**k it!", which I found pretty humorous at that time as it involves screaming "f**k it!!" as loud as you can before you begin an artpiece. I sort of understood the connotation of the technique, but never fully grasp it till now.
I guess in short I've learned that this is my sketchbook. I draw what I want. I don't need to care if it's ugly, or if other people don't know what the hell I drew, or if it doesn't look as good as my friends. I'm just gonna have fun.
I don't think I've had this many words in my artblog posts. Ever.
13 derps:
And now it starts...
NIck- Indeed. I thought it started a long time ago, but the journey is just beginning. :D
That looks lovely! And it also rings painfully true for me too. I always had a hard time keeping a sketchbook because I felt like everything inside had to be 'good' or for some kind of acedemic improvement. Maybe I need some of this "F**k It and just Draw!" technique too! XD
I was really curious what you guys were drawing over there while I was getting madeover. I'm glad it all resulted in an epiphany and re-discovery!
nice sketch!
wow. sounds like you are already into your "next level" of life. The "f**K it" is something that i always want to do but i can never 100% approach it. I wish you good luck and congratulations of the society of illustration and you work and your new art life! i will see you around!
In a way, this same drive to be perfect is what Black Swan was about. It's about how some people can't reach their maximum potential because they never let themselves be confident.
thanks a lot for this.
i've been struggling with the same thing for god knows how long. and reading that you had the same issue too and broke through was just what I needed.
Lurial- Thanks, Yanni! Yeah. One day, truly try that technique. You might unleash your voice in a way you never thought you could. Haha.
Neiko- Thanks, Neiko! I'll definitely see you guys around at workshops! Gonna try my best to make it for them.
Jelter- Wow. I watched the movie but I never knew it related to this. I guess I focused too much on the schizophrenia part..
- - My pleasure. I think it's a common artistic struggle for most of us artist who are striving to be good. I hope you'll be able to able to get your breakthrough too. :D
Wow! Looks like it's more common than you think - I've been having that same issue since my last semester or two. I don't even think they always have to be two separate things, necessarily - but I've been lacking a lot of passion and motivation lately. I think I'll try your technique :3
i've read this the 2nd time... just too inspiring :3
I know this problem from the idea of creating "deep meaningful" stuff against the stuff that is "childish and fun". I have come to the same conclusion and it seems to build up so much more fresh and personal, and probably wii be challenging for dear category-fanatics :D "love it , f*** it".
give back a positive message to f****** h** r***** g**d !!!! muse is the best wifu~, bitchy, challenging, but for ever waiting somewhere ;)
Awesome man... Matthew 18:3
Kelly- Haha, yeah. try it. You might find your artistic voice speaks a lot louder that way. Good luck!
Jamie- Awwwww. :D glad you find it so, Jamie. And I'm touched you read it twice.. haha..
Surthur- Hahaha. yeah. There you go. For a while I was like my pieces are so shallow... but now I don't even care anymore.
Charles- Nice verse reference. Haha.
Thanks for sharing. That's awesome! Keep unleashing your voice! It's beautiful.
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